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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:27 PM   #1

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Why do some young people isolate themselves?


The Japanese call it Hikikomori, and it is happening all over the world. Young people who choose to stay indoors, isolating themselves from society. Why is this happening?

[ame=http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hikikomori]Hikikomori - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia[/ame]
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:33 PM   #2

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It is hard for a young person to find their niche.
There are a lot of awkward years ahead of them and
they just cannot find a welcoming port.
Kids want to be popular, etc, but many don't have the
social skills developed to reach out. Rejection hurts.
Being sequestered away is more comforting to them,
more happy things surround them. Additionally what nice
skills they have, the internet lets them become equal
with adults or peers.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:40 PM   #3

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Its too easy to become involved in the virtual world and neglect reality.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:40 PM   #4

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I imagine as a teacher TJ, you have some experience with this.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:45 PM   #5

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perhaps it is to do with the rebellious phase most of us go through in our teenage years. this phase is very important in a persons development as it forces them to brake from those around them and become there own self. you may find for instance that people who did not go through some semblance of this phase may still be living with there parents years later as they never learned to be independently minded.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:47 PM   #6

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So, is it really a problem? Should these kids just be left alone?
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Old November 29th, 2011, 04:49 PM   #7

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Quote:
Originally Posted by unclefred View Post
I imagine as a teacher TJ, you have some experience with this.
As do most of the teachers here on site. Or if they don't, give them time and
they'll see it.
In schools, there's always a 'click' of girls or boys & it is hard to crack that click.
I've seen really smart kids just shy away in crowds as they aren't the cute ones
getting all the attention. Girls seem to be the worst as they want to look cute
and wear all the fashionable clothes but just don't have the frame. Boys want to
be studs, with cool hair and good at sports.
I see a lot of kids turn to reading or drawing to compensate.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 05:00 PM   #8

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jake10 View Post
So, is it really a problem? Should these kids just be left alone?
perhaps there should be a line whereby you don't allow the child to completely withdrawn from everyone.

there's no one size fits all for this as each person will be unique so you should try to talk with them and see what exactly they want. if there in a closed off state where they refuse to talk they are likely going through some depression, don't allow them to slip over the abyss but don't push them for more information if there unwilling as they may only close up further. for instance i'm a very withdrawn person but that's only because i prefer being on my own so it has never really bothered me.
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Old November 29th, 2011, 10:18 PM   #9

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I understand what you're saying. Sometimes it's best to let them be, but I wonder how this will effect society. After all, humans usually don't work alone, even if some would like to. It is necessary to cooperate with others, to the point that we often have to assist people we don't like.

In other words, it's not only about the needs of the individuals, although these needs also play a part.
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Old November 30th, 2011, 04:02 AM   #10

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I was like this as a teen, especially in my senior year of high school when a lot of my friends went their separate ways (one moved to a different school, another joined the "popular group" and never spoke to me again, and two others had boyfriends they were wrapped up in and didn't really have time for me anymore) and I was left with no good friends (just a few acquaintances, people I could talk to in school but we didn't socialize outside of school). Plus, academically, school was always difficult for me due to undiagnosed dyslexia. I spent most of my time in my bedroom and when I was forced to come out, I usually had my headphones and portable CD player on. 15 minute car ride? Hey, that's about 3 songs I can squeeze in before we get to our destination and my dad tells me to take the headphones off.

I think I just felt very alone at the time and wanted to filter out the outside world which I wanted to escape from. I felt like my dad didn't understand me (despite the fact that he had the same academic problems I did), my mom tried to but couldn't fully and I basically had no close friends. So I withdrew into myself.

I don't think it effects society in the long run. I came out of it after a few years when I got into my 20s and developed more of a social life and figured out what I wanted to do for a living. It was just a phase and it doesn't mean I can't work and live with others as an adult.
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