Please Critique my Essay on Mesoamerican Warfare

Aug 2016
872
USA
#1
I have to do an essay for my College World-History class. In it, we do a 5-7 page paper on a specific subject in history. I chose Pre-Contact Mesoamerican Warfare. It's due by 11-2-18, which is this Friday, November 2018. I'm just mentioning the date so people don't waste their time posting here after that date has passed. Please consider giving me some tips. Thanks.

HIS101_Research_Paper
 
Last edited:
Oct 2018
39
Raritania
#2
I have to do an essay for my College World-History class. In it, we do a 5-7 page paper on a specific subject in history. I chose Pre-Contact Mesoamerican Warfare. It's due by 11-2-18, which is this Friday, November 2018. I'm just mentioning the date so people don't waste their time posting here after that date has passed. Please consider giving me some tips. Thanks.

HIS101_Research_Paper
Pretty good. One thing that personally bothers me is that you said ‘this essay’ in the beginning. I’m in middle school so I could be wrong but I’ve always been taught don’t say ‘essay’ in an essay. Other than that really swell!
 
Oct 2013
13,798
Europix
#5
nitpicking (but I am a nitpicker ...)

"Many historians contend that ... "
"archeologists have discovered ... "
"Many modern people would ... "


That kind of formulation should be avoided.

When You said "historians", or "archaeologists" or "people" You should be able to provide the source (Historian "X", archaeologist "Y", person "Z" plus the paper/study/vid/whatever)

Putted the way You wrote it, it gives the impression of "hear-say" and that's something You don't want in an essay.

My two pennies, hope it helps.
 
Aug 2014
4,212
Australia
#7
You are mischaracterising the mechanical properties of bronze and obsidian. The only advantage obsidian has is sharpness, which is only useful if you are making a scalpel. On a combat blade it is irrelevant. Bronze has similar mechanical properties as medium carbon steel so can hold an edge for a long time. Obsidian is only useful for one hit before you lose the edge. It is just as labour intensive to knapp a new edge on a stone blade than it is to resharpen a metal blade. In combat, bronze is superior to obsidian in every conceivable way so there is no practical reason why they chose to use obsidian over bronze. The only conceivable reason is that it wasn't available in sufficient quantities.

You are relying on some outdated info regarding their textile armour. There are no texts stating that they strengthened it with brine. As far as I can tell this myth originated from a dodgy translation. Salt does nothing to strengthen cotton armour. Salt is used even today as a fabric softener. All salt does is cause severe skin irritations if is ingrained in the cloth. Texts state that their textile armour was anywhere from 2 to 3 fingers in thickness. Armour this thick does not breath at all and is significantly heavier than an equivalent armour made from metal. At least some of the armour we thought was made from cotton was probably made from maguey fibres.
 
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Aug 2014
4,212
Australia
#8
The myth about brine likely came from de Landa's book. He wrote that they used salt but he makes no mention of quilting. The Mayan word for "salt" is tab and the Mayan word for "tied/quilted" is taab. So, when he asked the Mayans how they made their armour they probably replied "with cotton and quilting" and he mistranslated and wrote down "with cotton and salt".
 
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Aug 2014
4,212
Australia
#9
Hmm, it is very difficult to write an essay on this topic. You should make 5-7 pages of text on the theme of the Mesoamerican war while doing so should make the work very unique and express your opinion on this topic. I think you have given a lot of moments to the historical components and not to highlight your own point of view on this situation. In each essay, you should look for some key problem for which you need to cling. Such requirements were given to us at the university. I think that if you have such difficulties with writing an essay, then you should use the resource PapersOwl to write an assignment for you. I have used it many times. I believe that such services help you find a mistake in your essay or project. I just can not imagine how to write such a complex essay without the help of professionals. After all, there is nothing bad in it, you will save a lot of time and get a really good essay. This is my vision for your problem. Good luck
So you reckon that there is nothing wrong with cheating? "oh dear this subject is too difficult for my poor snowflake sensitivities so I'll get someone else to do it for me."
If someone gets convicted of a crime and sent to prison then do you think it would be ok to pay another person to serve their sentence for them?
 
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Mar 2018
655
UK
#10
Hmm, it is very difficult to write an essay on this topic. You should make 5-7 pages of text on the theme of the Mesoamerican war while doing so should make the work very unique and express your opinion on this topic. I think you have given a lot of moments to the historical components and not to highlight your own point of view on this situation. In each essay, you should look for some key problem for which you need to cling. Such requirements were given to us at the university. I think that if you have such difficulties with writing an essay, then you should use the resource PapersOwl to write an assignment for you. I have used it many times. I believe that such services help you find a mistake in your essay or project. I just can not imagine how to write such a complex essay without the help of professionals. After all, there is nothing bad in it, you will save a lot of time and get a really good essay. This is my vision for your problem. Good luck
This is nothing more than an ad, and an obvious one at that. Reported.
 

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